Ingemar Stenmark and Börje Salming Engaged:
Former skiing superstar Ingemar Stenmark and hockey legend Börje Salming are, despite their own denials, more than "just friends." According to our reliable source, they are engaged to be married. Our source explains: "Why else would Mr Stenmark move from the skiing paradise Monaco to Vaxholm---a dreary Stockholm suburb---into the house next to that of Mr Salming? Scarcely for tax purposes..." The same source indicates that the two will be tying the knot this coming Midsummer, and that Pope Benedictus Himself will perform the matrimonial sermon. His Holiness will then have to overlook the facts that Mr Stenmark was previously married, that Mr Salming is currently married, that neither of the two is Catholic, that both of them are male, and that Swedish Midsummer is a pagan ritual.
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